THERE ONCE WAS A HARLET FROM QUE
WHO FILLED HER VAGINA WITH GLUE
SHE SAID WITH A GRIN
“IF THEY PAY TO GET IN
THEY’LL PAY TO GET OUT OF IT TOO..

THERE WAS A YOUNG GIRL FROM DUNDEE
WAS TAKING A SWIM IN THE SEA
BUT A MAN IN A PUNT
STUCK AN OAR IN HER… EYE
AND NOW SHE WEARS GLASSES YOU SEE

THERE WAS A YOUNG GAUCHO CALLED BRUNO
WHO SAID “THERE’S ONE THING THAT I DO KNOW,
A WOMAN IS FINE
A GIRL IS DIVINE
BUT A LLAMA IS NUMERO UNO”

That naughty ol’ Bishop of Birmingham
Buggered three maids while confirming ‘em,
As they knelt seeking God, he excited his rod,
And pumped his episcopal sperm in ‘em.